Please, let me fuck your mom
it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
How long does it take to cook a corndog over a candle?
Sorry for trying to force you and Robert to make out. I didn't realize how awkward it was until I woke up today.
i told you that I felt like my feet were melting into the ground and you starting blowing on them to put out the "invisible fire". thanks friend.
The chips are stabbing my teeth, and I can feel the muscle under my mouth contracting.
Babies are disgusting. I held one once. Then I washed my hands and rinsed my mouth out with wine.
I don't know what to say to that. All I know is my vagina is trying to jump through the phone.
I only remember singing the Captain Planet theme song on our way to the bars.
I SHOULD NOT BE HAVING AN EXISTENTIAL CRISIS OVER PIZZA
The more I drank he just got hotter and hotter. And then the mustache didn't look too bad
They gave my sperm a pep talk after they found out we were trying.to have.a baby.
So here I am, sexting at work.
Dennis picked up a 50 year old woman. Then he and Dan got in a fight and jumped out of the limo. No one knows what happened to them.
Randomize
