I can't get in trouble, i'm smoking a bong in the office right now
id be glad to
I tried to gradually lead her into my room but she wouldn't stop crying and quoting memoirs of a geisha
i think i pulled off the nice guy thing too well. it just backfired later on when she thought i was actually nice.
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
Everybody knows the last week of summer internships include showing up to the office hammered and hitting on the CEO
I still havent gotten an apartment yet, so I crash random college parties...get so drunk and then sleep on their couch
I am thinkingif I am doing snow Angels in your living room, I probably had too much to drink
He told his ice cream cone it 'looked cute' and then started to cry. The Dairy Queen people were not pleased.
yes i am an adult who snuck out of my parents house to cuddle with a guy and then came home and listened to taylor swift. judge me all you want.
You broke the end off a wine bottle, ran outside and screamed "FOR NARNIA!!"
I'm getting offered Candy Crush lives in return for sex. Like wtf.
Last thing I remember was a hand in the pants. Then I woke up next to a full beer and a McDouble, which I promptly had for breakfast.
If those panties could talk.
"Once upon a time, Jenny got chlamydia from a magician. The end."
Pretty sure if we keep hanging out on Tuesdays there will be no whiskey left for the younger generations or the universe will implode....tomato tahmato
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