this dieting is killing me...just started drooling watching a dog food commercial
you turned on the Care Bears movie at 5am and kept screaming "I CARE"
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
She whispered into my eat that she wanted me to fuck her while her parrot watched...
I'd say you were a shitshow. Playing floating beer pong in the pool you kept filling other people's cups with pool water and laughing to yourself.
I tripped over a vacuum cleaner and fell into a beer pyramid
Feels like someone put a cigar out where my butthole used to live
It's a lube slip n slide down the hallway now. Details later.
she definitely didn't appreciate it when you justified bringing her home by yelling to me "fat bitches need love too"
Are we going to go home and do it or do I have time to eat my nachos bell grande first?
My mom has a bong in her bathroom, but no air freshener.
Why is there a pair of panties on my front lawn?
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
I'm too horny to sleep. I need some violent sex to wind me down.
Randomize
