She said if it slipped out one more time she was going to duct tape it in her vagina
I just found a Chris Hansen soundboard online, care to guess what I'll be doing all day?
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
This flask doesn't match my outfit. I hope the gays don't mind.
basically theres shrimp everywhere. splattered on the walls, in the carpet, its bad. ohh theyre never gonna get the smell out.
I was really disturbed by what initially appeared to be a dismembered head sitting beside you. Then I realized you were laying on her body.
its sad that I know 23 beers will fit into my purse
He asked if I smoke and I said "only fools like you on the basketball court!" Then I started crying. I think I'm about to have my period.
I'm drinking straight vodka and railing lines of adderall while writing a paper about the nature of Jesus. It's 6:50 in the morning. College.
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
I just found a grey hair. On my nipple. Fuck you too, Mother Nature.
It tasted better than Jesus's hair.
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
Just letting you know that I just spent 11 dollars on a car wash... Because you had sex in my car.
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