i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
Dude, I just went to take a piss and looked at my ballsack... Underneath was labled "L" and "R"
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
She got a digital picture frame for her birthday. FINALLY - a place for me to sneak all those penis shots I've taken with my iPhone.
Im not moving so it's going to have to be a 3 some.
Fuck. I'm going to pass the savings right on to the strippers. It's trickle down economics.
There is a visibable outline from you in the grass. its you in the fetal position...
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
As the night goes on these shots are getting so much easier. My liver jst needed a warmup lap.
If he can forgive your lousy blowjobs, you can ignore his terrible driving.
he drank all my beer while i was at work and passed out on my couch, when i got home he was out cold and my room mates pig was licking him. they seemed peaceful, so i took 20 bucks from his wallet and left again.
I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together
we need to find a way to be drinking champagne 24/7
I woke up with a hangover and a man bun. Reached over to drink water and accidentally chugged raspberry vodka. So there's that.
Are those your contacts stuck to the mirror?!
Yeah. Drunk me tried to put my contacts on the mirror where my eyes were.
Randomize
