FYI: if you have sex in your room with the light on, we can totally see your shadows from the parking lot
Your boyfriend has good rhythm though.
laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
She wouldn't stop saying her own name. Like a damn pokemon.
Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.
Hes screaming about Slender man. whatever hes on is probably not healthy.
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
So we broke my sobriety. Played life size childhood games. Broke into a cold hot tub and got laid. I think this is BFF quality!
She pulled me up to my feet by my hair. I thought it was you for a second. My drunken angel savior.
Guess who just enrolled into online classes at Hogwarts? This gal.
this place is dumb. no one understands my Sunday morning alcoholism here.
I just sugar scrubbed my vagina. If I don't get laid tonight, me and the universe are gonna have some problems.
They had like literally all the dildos. It looked like a seance for dick. I left the apartment and haven't been back.
I was at a crossroads, dude. Like, do I wanna eat chicken McNuggets or talk about my feelings?
There's something empowering about being at dinner and sitting across the table from two men you've blown.
He doesn't wear a seatbelt. He votes Republican. He has a small dick. That house of cards just fell apart.
Randomize
