YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
I have two girls sleeping in my bed naked and I ended up making it to class, what were you saying about staying in on the weekdays?
OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?
On the airplane today the pilot actually said "Ladies and gentlemen I'm sorry for the delay. But I know all of you have problems, and so do we..."
He's engaged. If the world's smallest penis can find true love than I can too.
Just found cake in my bra, debating if I should eat it
Dont forget about the tuna sandwich behind your TV
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
Just beat off to internet porn while talking to my mom on the phone and eating a cinnamon roll. U have 5 minutes to get on my level
Apparently I told the girl smoking was terrible for her, and then requested it in my mouth.
He told me I was a pleasure to arrest. That's the 2nd time I've heard that.
If you're staying here tonight, you need to promise me you won't make another bonfire in the lounge room. My girl is still pissed about that.
all night she kept rolling over and mumbling something about wanting an extendable retractable urethra.
I was stuffing my vagina with gummy bears last night having him eat them out of me. Team Haribo for the win!
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