she was left over bi-product, like the hotdog of the human race
This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
happy birthday! Any relationship between us is now officially illegal.
Out of all the people in the house to show their tits at mcdonalds to try and get free food, they picked those two?
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
I'm beer bonging chocolate fondue. That's how my Valentines Day is going.
Like an undercooked grilled cheese that got cold again. But hairy.
And there goes my desire for sandwiches. Forever.
The neighbor just yelled bring me back that big red alien penis.
The girl neighbor.
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
he left a full can of coors light underneath my windshield wiper, like a love note. if that's not husband material, i don't know what is
So yeah, my old kindergarten teacher just asked me who gave me the hickies on me neck.
Tell him to put up or shut up. Can't be dangling dick in front of ho's without delivering.
It's just disrespectful
As we were walking to her place she stole a pizza from the delivery guy's car and when we got home she grabbed a slice, two beers, removed her pants, and said "call of duty?" im going to marry her
Tell me why I woke up with your dads construction shirt on, nothing else, and had jelly donuts with a note from a girl named cathryn that said "we had a kinky night with peanut butter". p.s. Im by the layin by the lawnmower
HILY FUCK HES HERE I HAVE MONISTAT IN ME HE SUPRISED ME
Randomize