MY DAD AND I ARE ON OUR WAY OUT OF FLORENCE AND I JUST SAW A MAN AT A BUS STOP WITH A GIMP HAND SLAP HIS DAUGHTER ACROSS THE FACE WITH IT.
then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
please keep texting me so i can pretend someone likes me
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
I think a kid would responsible me up
The $10 cab ride turned into a $60 cab ride when you puked down the back of his seat trying to whisper in his ear. He was a trooper though, he came into to wash off in the sink and still tried to get your number.
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
Maybe she'll change her mind but the "go fuck yourself" doesn't seem promising
I've officially slept through a hurricane, a tornado and had sex during an earthquake. I'm surviving.
You yell at me for being attracted to older guys and you're over here condoning murder
Yes be both agreed it was the worst sex in the history of fornication, so I asked him to sign the condom wrapper so I could frame it as a reminder to NEVER sleep with him again
"hahahaha" is not a sufficient reply when I tell you my mother laughed at a joke about me giving blowjobs.
We need to stop smoking. I just ran into a glass door.
The guy in the cage next to me is having phone sex. His girlfriend is in College Library. Why is my life ridiculous.
Randomize
