i think the semi hot bartender might actually be a man in drag..on a similar note, what are you drinking?
Life lesson: if you fart while talking to a girl outside, the smell does not dissipate, it just lingers around mocking you
Some asshole just brought BK into my summer class, im already high as hell, i did not need another way to not pay attention
He just did blow off my nipples. He's not serious about his girlfriend.
She told me that as long as she kept starring at the freckle on her arm she wouldnt throw up
Strip beer pong in the front yard? Of course the cops showed up
I wonder what chicks would think if they learned that when we add them on fb we email their bikini pics to each other.
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
Finally washing the shoe scuff marks off my front windshield :( bye bye memories
I'm in the power napping at parties stage of my life
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
Nothing will stop me from making the title of my paper "The Great Political Cock Block." Absolutely nothing.
Apparently mid making out I got up and said "I need to figure out my life" went in the bathroom and threw up for two hours.
I’ve had a lot of vodka, 3 different dicks and no food since last night. Come get me
I'm wearing men's underwear
I don't know what to do with that information...
Randomize
