His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
I want you more than these girls want KFC
My cousin just asked what abortion is. Happy Holidays.
i checked my sent messages this morning and i had apparently tried to text the bar, saying "idk what i drank, do you?"
We are two peas in an std pod
ALL CAPS CUZ ITS SERIOUS SHAME.
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
I know. It's cray. Crayon. Crayolaaaaa.
After her AA meeting, she was on the phone with her mom, and when she said, "they're making me start over with Step 1," I quietly sang, "cut a hole in the box".
I hate that we are older than the real world people now
In the pie chart of my life, she is a huge part of why I drink.
So I've decided that blue balls for lesbians is rainbow balls and the struggle is real
This is the second time this month a hookup cried when I left...bro get your shit together bar does NOT equal wife 😬
Apparently "Welcome to the Sin Cave" is not how I'm supposed to answer the door
We were having sex but then he spanked me and i punched him but it was just a reflex i swear
Randomize
