Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
my new years resolutions dont apply when im drunk
the girl next to me in class is drinking a margarita out of a slurpee cup. i know your going to ask how i know its a margarita and the answer is i can smell the tequila. i never want to leave this place
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
K. On the way. I need a drink.
Like a drink drink or like water?
Have we met?
Please tell me the foreign boys in the kitchen this morning were yours.
You came back with four clearly unattractive women and wanted to throw a dance party in my room.
I wish I could rewind to my 8th birthday instead. I wanna wake up, eat as much cake as I want, and have a Transformers birthday party without someone judging me.
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
You need to come back and help me drink our beer so the fridge has room for the other beers
I just stood beside an Amish man and bought Cocoa Krispies and tampons.
SHE MASTURBATED TO THE THOUGHT OF ME HAVING AN ALL DUDE THREESOME WITH HER EX BOYFRIENDS.
Having Father’s Day on Pride weekend is always so awkward. “Hey dad just calling to say I love you.” While I’m navigating my way through a pop up pool at a bar riding a penis floatie. Happy Father’s Day.
You've had it in your mouth, how have you not seen it?
Randomize
