Do you think Capital One would let me put the Tub Girl picture on my Capital One card?
Beat you to it.
When I'm drunk and can't pee, I sing my abc's in my head and try to pee before I get to pee. Last night I forgot to do it in my head
she met some random, took his vcard, peed in his bed, left, and then requested him as her boyfriend on facebook
I came home to my brother stoned out of his mind. He got a high score on COD and asked me to have a celebration yogurt with him.
Apparently Bin Ladens last act of terrorism is cock blocking me....
i didnt think "maybe you should take over" was a good thing to say when i couldnt get it up
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
BTW, you ever shave a dick into my dog, I'll cut you. I'll laugh first, but then I'll cut you
The walk of shame is a lot easier when I'm at a music festival and it's 12 feet from his tent to my tent
You are living the dream.
Nope. I've found you care about two things in life: your momma and spreading your seed.
It was one of those mornings when I wake up and feel like I have to say sorry to the whole world
I had 2 shots but she spilt one on me. Kinda mad but kinda grateful
Come cuddle! I'll be passed out somewhere in the library. It'll be like a scavenger hunt!
I am no longer and illegal Moonshiner. I just made thousands of gallons of incredibly High test alcohol with police watching and waiting for thare couple of jugs so that they can bring home and disinfect their houses with it. I'm fat with money at the moment.
Randomize
