Fun fact: when I ripped off my wristband, I punched myself in the face. Rad
no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
I think his parents are learning english from the phrases I shout during sex.
Worst hangover of my career vs the return of the blue balls. Will keep updated
Ya he's the booze devil, like if the black hole and Bermuda triangle joined forces with Captain Morgan
Totally. Bang on. He'll be fine. He might cry into your perfect tits once in a while, but that's the price ya pay.
Walk of shame dressed as a Christmas tree, it happened. Ho ho ho bitches
Dude I woke up and he was pissing in the corner on his clothes... I called his name an he replied " I got this" and continued.
I need an inhaler full of pot for all of this breathless rage.
Running my fingers through my hair is like that scene from Patch Adams where the girl goes swimming in a pool of spaghetti. I love molly.
Give me an out of order sign and caution tape and we can have sex practically anywhere.
How proud should I be that I googled "dildo with wheels" and actually got the result I wanted?
if by making eggnog you mean drinking all the spiced rum, then yes, she's making eggnog
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
How do you explain to your parents that you can't go to the library because you got banned for being drunk in there... on a Sunday afternoon?
That's $100,000 of quality education right there.
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