This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
I see you felt the need to carve your name in my kitchen table. thanks
I know I'm her Sunday school teacher. I just feel I would be saving others from a lot of headaches by telling her someday she's going to be a stripper
She kept looking at me and saying "you are the scary high".
If thou arrisest to consciousness before I, rise me to an office of alertness for occupations such as brunch. Warm Regards, your roommate.
It looks like someone bombed the living room with his and your clothes, bra, packing peanuts, nerf gun and ammo, rc helicopter, leftover chinese food and a leather paddle.
Every time I someone I meet again from that wedding it turns into the "Oh your the guy who puked in the hallway and passed out in front of the elevator."
I don't know what to say to that. All I know is my vagina is trying to jump through the phone.
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
Personally, if my roommate had a nice friend who made me dinner, gave me free beer, a 4am meal, a couch to sleep on in an apartment on the beach, and breakfast when I woke up, and I found out that said roommate was fucking her, I'd be all... right on! She's cool! Thanks for the quesadillas!
I'm 99% sure I just flashed my dad with my vagina. So that's the new low now.
Probably won't be invited back there again considering last time his purebred corgi ate my pot brownie and had to be rushed to the hospital.
Basically, I am an endless fountain of unconvential sexual experiences and knowledge.
Randomize
