Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
We just walked into this party and immediately got handed a grilled cheese sandwhich....
bad decision saturdays are such a good decision
i can recognize that vagina from a mile away
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
It's like the last supper of drinking before the summer ends
It's not meant to be. I also just shot a turkey baster of gin into Nate's eye, so....
I just fucked her in her boyfriends bathroom... he was in the room sleeping.
My fuck buddy is great and all, but it gets weird when she gets in arguments with her BF in the driveway
What drugs are we doing when you visit?
The correct answer is all the drugs because I just found out they have glow in the dark bubbles.
So note to self oboe reeds soaked in Apple Rubinoff sound GREAT.
Mostly i might never get belligerent again because im gonna have to keep track of a diamond ring.
You have ruined sex with him for me. Now all I think is "boy scout" and I want to go home
You, me, naked, mistletoe, fifth of jack, gallon of lube, condoms, Cheetos, handcuffs, rope, along with no morals, inhibition or judgment. That's all I want for Christmas.
Update: I just threw up in between cars in the parking lot of magic kingdom.
Randomize
