PS- did you die? If you did just text "dead" to me, so that I know.
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
The tent neighbors already set us on fire w an errant roach. How do you think Bonnaroo's going?!
yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
we all took turns holding you up and pretending that you were simba and that we were presenting you to the jungle
To the genius that put everclear in my humidifier: your time is coming.
My hickies are dark enough that I can feel drivers judging me from across an intersection
Just missed the last train for another 5 hours. There are balls in or around the mouth of my life.
I think I'll handle my grief by throwing myself headlong into lesbianism. Seems like a fitting tribute to you.
Then, she put flavored warming oil on my dick and was amazed when something she bought FROM SPENCER'S almost burned my dick off.
How about we just fuck in random places all around campus, and skip the boring relationship part?
We played 2 very competitive games of Jenga and then fucked our brains out... BEST. RELATIONSHIP. EVER.
All of a sudden he got that look on his face and ran to the dance floor and started fist pumping to Rihanna that kind of night
Randomize
