Jager Bombs are cool, but hydrogen bombs are where it's at. Sparks and jager equals instant black out, I mistakenly tried eating a cigarette thinking it was a nacho.
I swear it started with good intentions but then my slutty side took over and we started playing strip checkers
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
We are keeping it ultra classy drinking 40s and playing croquet with 90s rap blasting in the back ground
You got in the cab and told the cab driver "we only have seven bucks so you better drive fucking fast".
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
He has blue eyes of sex and i am powerless against them
Doesn't tell me where my computer chair went but good to know
there are no losers in shot checkers. only winners.
I just got St Patricks day and the day after St Patricks day off, wich I'm pretty sure is as close to a raise as I'll ever get.
She proceeded to flip everyone off then open a Heineken with her teeth.
PS- My flight is being emergency landed bc someone smuggled cats on the plane.
A toast to whoever set this year's daylight savings fallback to the day after halloween, granting us another hour to detox before we pretend to be functional adults. Clearly, a partier with forethought and clear priorities. Cheers!
rest in peace liver.
It was nice having you occupy space in my body that could be holding beer n chicken.
that's going in my livers obituary.
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
Fuck you. Fuck this party. I just wanted to be pretty with a cute little tiara and boys sucking my tits, now i have a hangman game drawn on my face and jello shots in my hair.
I wanted to give you a great birthday party. You know I did.
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