it's my fault, I passed out instead of getting up to pee.
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
You can't like Harry Potter and Twilight. You have to pick. Vampires and Wizards are mutually exclusive.
the people going to church this morning while i was walking home did not seem as pleased as i was with how many beads i earned last night
it was either a really good one night stand or a really really good first date. thank you online dating
I feel like letting the same guy who shot him dig the pellet out of his leg with a pocket knife was the bigger mistake
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
I wonder if our vaginas are like "o thank god, no strangers breaking in tonight." Baahhhh sooo bad
I mean...he was throwing up for almost 3 consecutive hours. I don't think there's a chance in hell that would have tasted even close to tolerable.
Also, as my manager i'm going to put you in charge of making sure i don't drown.
the other day i was so high i found pages and pages of pictures of HD hamburgers and patriotic music. bong rips for merica.
i hope you're proud of yourself! i just had to ask my boss to put ointment on the rugburn on my back. clothes hurt!
So here's a brief summary of my weekend: last night I drank four glasses of Death Punch, grabbed the toaster, said "This is mine", put it in my pants and walked out the front door.
Well, my mom found the ball gag and whip. Looks like I'm never going home again.
Did you really have to freak out and get up half way through to put the cat in the closet?
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