That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
I feel uncomfortable when she gargles my jizz.
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
We found her in the fireplace eating dog biscuits.
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Justin Timberlake, while dressed as Britney Spears. Fuck Jessica Biel, all my 90's dreams are coming true.
No more. You can't have nice things, and vodka is a nice thing.
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
Yup, two strangers look up at each other and realize the only connection they have is the dead woman they banged to death below them. Magic. They have to be best friends now.
Did you put Dave Matthews band on the playlist? It's really hard to funnel when "Crash Into Me" kicks in.
Whoever decided to put a Denny's that close to the strip club is a genius.
She swallowed the key to the cuffs, I've been having to explain the pink fuzz all morning.
Is it a bad thing for a seven year old to call one an alcoholic? Asking for a friend..
No alcohol sales on Election Day. WTF? Today, of all days, I need to be splurged to to vote for any of these morons running for president.
i'll...probably just offer you drugs?
i'll...probably take them in all honesty
Randomize
