Dude, I'm in her bathroom and there's crab shampoo... is it worth the risk?
You're missing what this discovery implies... she's got a fucking bush.
I wish there were wingman of the year awards.
and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
So i banged this chick from Peru last night. Needless to say, I'm having chipotle for lunch todayas a south American reward to honor her.
Just tried my new showerhead. Sex with Brian will never be the same.
under NO circumstances is it acceptable to fist pump to taylor swift
what if his mom answers? its like high school, but hes 30
Just gave a urinal high five to a complete stranger. Might not be such a bad night after all
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
Casually had to file a missing persons report last night
Didn't get the job. Searched for my references on FB and saw the pic of me weighing my head passed out.
Hypothetically going to the gym on coke was a good idea
somebody should make me the poster child for not drinking everclear..
She brought me back a blanket from Mexico, then we had sex on it
Oh by "being festive" I mean make tacos for dinner.
I went next door to get a can opener from them. They opened the door shirtless, asked me if I wanted to a smoke a joint with them. Then decided to make blueberry smoothies. But the yogurt in the blender & the berries, got confused when the berries blended into the yogurt and just kept adding more. Only stopped when we ran out of berries.
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