I found your undies. They were wrapped around my leg.
Mat is currently running around his basement "trying to catch oxygen in his mouth."
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
He passes out, I smoke his kush. All's fair in love and a disappointing lack of sex.
Woke up chewing my pillow from a dream where I was scarfing Cajun pasta from TGI Friday's. That's a new level of fat, even for us
That's not a good night. A good night is waking up with no skirt, no money, and the imprint of the edge of the bar on your forehead.
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
YOU GAVE HIM A BLOWJOB ON YOUR DOORSTEP?!
I am laying in your bed and just found a bottle of wine under your pillow ...should have married you...
Me and my bruised tit have to wake up at 4 AM.
My mom just told me I look like darth vader. how's your night?
i'm high and self actualising, please send help
Intoxication Level: I'm as graceful and flawless as a fucking dinosaur.
Im so unlucky if I fell in a barrel of dicks, I'd come our sucking my thumb
Randomize