Dude, we have the same penis size. Best friends for life.
Words of Wisdom: ordering a pitcher of whiskey cokes, putting a straw in it, and calling it your drink is not socially acceptable
A woman in the waiting room at the STD clinic told me that she is going to pray to jesus for my penis.
and people in Baltimore still get a bad wrap.
I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
His facebook says he is a fan of "underwater handjobs"
Went to the doctors. She saw my " I love beer" tattoo. All she said was " My drunken tat is of just one word. "Cornnuts.". Then said Mexico was "awesome." And sent me on my way. Yeah. She's my favorite doctor.
i was about to cum until he started doing shrek impressions.
Puked in my laptop case in the middle of my nutrition class.
I wonder if he has realized that I have poured all if those shots he bought into the tip jar
last night he took my thong off with his teeth... god bless champagne
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
PLAN B IS EXPENSIVE ON A $50 A WEEK BUDGET.
I had to replace her wine with red vitamin water. So if she’s alive, you can thank me
someone is getting fuckign RAWDOGGED on this campus as we speak and it makes me FURIOUS
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
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