Things overheard in WeHo: "Just drink a corona and eat some ass, you won't be hungry anymore"
I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
I couldn't get internet on my iPod in this hotel room for porn, so I made due with UFC.
I'm not sure what to say to that.
Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
u were so high that u chewed on candle wax for an hour
You are like a prophet. It's amazing how many people you convince to be lesbians.
I normally need adult supervision or a babysitter, but I refuse to let someone keep me from making irresponsible and wrong decisions at the bar on my last bday ill ever have in texas
Wait do you remember that guy last night asking to use my nose ring to open his beer.......
I JUST GOT WOKEN UP TO HIM PISSING ON ME SAYING "IT HAS TO HAVE WATER TO GO TO THE BATHROOM" AND AFTER HE FINISHED HE DIDNT REMEMBER DOING IT
Reminding you of hookups your brain is trying to suppress. That's what friends are fooooooooor...
I HAD TO PAY A COVER FOR THE FIRST TIME LAST NIGHT. My tits didn't get me in and I was so pissed.
It's really life affirming to be at a wedding thinking wow I took your husbands virginity
I probably would do him if given the chance but how awkward would Bible study be after that.
Why did I wake up covered in glitter next to a half eaten cheeseburger?
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