his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
There is a mermaid on oprah and she looks nothin like ariel
You came on your own forehead. Just wanted to remind you that.
I've been drunk so often this summer being sober is exciting
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
She's laying here with her head in my lap stoned, eating Doritos, whining about her boyfriend, and listening to Cher. Fuck the friend zone.
Want a slice of this weekend's hottest piece of ass?
Apparently when your theatre teacher asks who the best actor of our time is, Nicolas Cage is not the right answer.
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
The sad part is that if I don't get a random pic of your balls or ass or both every month, I start to worry that we're not friends anymore
Who'd have thought a guy with a lisp would be so good with his tongue?
He made me choke him and call him Papi..so all in all a good night.
Currently sifting through all the dick pics and nudes for a picture of my dad and I to post on social media for Father's Day...
I just got to my parents hungover as hell. My dad could tell and said "theres only one cure for a hangover" and handed me a beer. This morning went from a 0 to 10 in an instant.
Randomize
