So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
kindergarten is hard when you're hung over.
Just slept with my boyfriend's roomie to learn if bf was cheating on me
Good plan. When in doubt, sleep about.
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
I hope you don't have to start the day explaining to me how you failed to turn "Can I practice my belly dancing in your apartment" into all night sex.
I think ppl see us as an unstoppable drunken force
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
I THREW AWAY MY VIBRATOR BECAUSE IT INTIMIDATED HIM. WORST. DECISION. EVER
It took years to build this empire of casual fuckings and not carings.
So last night I turned down multiple drinks because "I didn't want to hold them". It's time reevaluate my decisions
So apparently my mom hired someone who goes by "DJ Dog Dick" for the family christmas party?
I think you might be the first man ever to describe getting a blowjob as "neat"
Disregard everything I texted you last night. Oh, and disregard me hooking up with your boyfriend.
I offered to go down on her because of how impressive her theatre career was. Stop letting me talk to lesbians.
Randomize
