i wish my apartment had room service that i didn't have to pay for.
He was trying to put his hand up my shirt but I remembered the coke was stashed in my bra so I moved his hand to my pants
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
He woke up licked his hand and put it on my vag and went back to sleep. This is twice this week and its only wednesday
It's "your husband had his mouth on my vagina" awkward.
They should have to wear some identification that warns you to stay away. Like one of those cones dogs wear to keep them from biting stitches. CONE OF SHAME.
Ok roommate is officially weird. Just watched her microwave the same broccoli 3 times in a row and cry b/c she fucked it up. Wtf lol
We have a vagina exchange agreement. Neither of us can hook up with any of our own law firm's summer associates. So we have a scout and referral program and invite each other to the other firm's summer events. Criss-cross!! Works every summer.
Sorry you had to clean the sheets with your macro notes
I showed my cat the amount of coke I had. She looked concerned.
You'll pass into the great gay beyond
Where it rains cosmopolitans and scantily clad gogo dancers of all genders direct traffic
Appreciate the offer but I'm a huge fan of penis
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
So if i am talking to a guy and he sends me a pic and he is wearing Spiderman button down dress shirt.... Is it ok if i dont want to talk to him anymore?
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
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