i jhust puked up my retainher.
There is an old man sitting across from me. Phone rang and his ringtone is children giggling, I'm not safe here.
Worst hangover of my career vs the return of the blue balls. Will keep updated
I pull out like 90% of the time, but that's just to make art.
She straight up told me, "I don't care if he films as long as he's quiet." You sure you can't find the camera?
N.C. cops just used a megaphone to tell me I have a slutty outfit. My life is complete.
I hope your fat roommate breaks the bunkbed and crushes you in your sleep
I've talked to too many cops in one week and I haven't even committed any crimes. I hate the suburbs
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
I just fell and sprained my ankle in the shower. No, I wasn't having sex. I was doing the time warp. Again.
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
You thought the flashing lights were strobe lights when they were loading you into the ambulance. You asked the EMT if he had any X.
I'm too pretty to be this sexually frustrated.
It was all like "my feathers evolved from scales of a reptile bitches!!" and I was all like "damn this chocolate milk is AWW SOOME!"
Randomize
