Thank God for loud music. There is a circus in my butt right now.
Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
A relator touring our house this week saw the picture in our bathroom of steven passed out, yellow faced, with BALLS on his forehead, and had to ask "if that kid was alive or dead".
I don't think I own any pants that haven't seen his bedroom floor anymore...
Drunkenly auctioned off my bed for 3 tequila shots
the coastal evacuation route ends at my vagina so you can just skip the bullshit and come over
This reunion sucks. All the confident hot girls from high school are still confident and hot, and none of the fat girls with low self esteem transformed into hot girls with low self esteem.
The moment you realize you should grow up: you're snorting your fathers percocet script with your old health insurance card, while your parents are on a 10 day cruise in the carribean...
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
I was so drunk last night I couldn't see faces, only from the shoulders down.
This bird just went for my eyes. Does he think I'm dead???
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
THERES A FUCKBOY IN MY PERSONAL SPACE
GET IT AWAY FROM ME IM ALLERGIC
Fortunatly we found him, he was on my roof. Unfortunatly, we can't say the same for his pants. Still looking. BRB.
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