we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
The online application for Mcdonald's said I could do incredible things there. Today I threw out shit filled underwear in the women's restroom and escorted a very drunk/high 42 year old man outside after he ordered a 5 dollar foot long and a bloody mary.
I still don't know why you took that job... it sounds miserable
not having any beer money sounds even more miserable
on a scale of 1 to 'no sex' how busy are you this week?
I haven't even booked my flights yet and I have my drug supply sorted
It might've been him telling me last night that he "doesn't even need beer goggles to fuck me." When I thought that was sweet, I realized something needed to change.
Got serenaded to on the streets of Denver...the song was about a young banana that made really big decisions, got stds, and joined a gang. I think I like Colorado
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
Nothing says I love you like a silicone dragon dick
It's like all the guys I keep around if I wanna have sex with all got mad at the same time. I guess I'll get out my vibrator again.
It's 6am and I had to explain to the gas station attendant why I didn't have shoes on and I'm covered in maple syrup.
Cover your peen. We're going out.
I know we're not on great terms here, but I need to know if you're still available for sexual activity...cause if not I need to get going on a work-out plan.
Randomize
