Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
I'be color coordinated the clothes in my closet and my underwear drawer. I'm like an advertisement for house arrest. Help.
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
I feel like he's mythological. Like you just had lunch with the Loch Ness Monster of hotness
Do you have pictures of my pancakes
I need to show the world
They are the pancake equivalent of eventual wife
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
I have this vague feeling that I was involved in a dance off with a homeless man?
Slept with the roommate last night and also discovered that she believes in eugenics. I may need to slow down my drinking
Just because your drunk doesn't mean you can stick your dick in the snow. Just a FYI
sorry bout the carpet, but you DID call it "blackout punch" not "don't vom on my floor punch"
He's eating a sriracha ravioli sandwich. How do you think the night is going?
I swear I only fuck him for the huge bottle of smart water he gives me afterwards.
What's the point of having a gay best friend if he doesn't play with your titties?
Randomize