is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
He threw up over the balcony and blamed it on an invisible garden gnome.
Just got thank you sex for shoveling the driveway. I cant wait for the next blizzard
Either I got the clap, or I masturbated with soap while I was sleeping.
She gave me head while using a laptop on my stomach to go online. I've never seen a better feat of multitasking.
Just saw the guy with the plastic bag on his head riding his bike again...
MASS TEXT: who ever dared Todd to suck on the Clorox wipes last night.. good goin jackass. you can come visit him, hes in room 266, AFTER hes done getting his stomach pumped.
HE DARED ME TO DARE HIM... DONT PUT THAT ON ME.
It's Been clinically proven that people who have sex 6 or more times per week are happier than those who don't. Just and FYI. For your mental health. From a soon so be psychologist. Who is drunk.
I told the person I was on the phone with to hold on while I looked for my phone. I think it's time to stop doing dabs.
My sister just showed me a snap chat that I don't remember sending, it was a picture of me with two big macs in my bra with just the words "BURGER TITS"
Nothing says I love you like a silicone dragon dick
One of the worst parts about living at my parents again is trying to hide how often I'm hungover, just quietly puked in the basement bathroom while my mom got ready for work
I honestly didn't think living in Canada would change me, until I found myself watching hockey porn
On the way home she told me she was in kindergarten when 9/11 happened
You drank whiskey for 9 hours and did not eat anything.Nothing good was going to come from that.
Randomize
