He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
taking shots each time the weatherman says Dont go out in this blizzard
i just lost my virginity for the 9th time. when will guys stop believing that nonsense line
I want to bury your face in my vagina. Possibly by force. I will try not to suffocate you though.
Look on the bright side. Now you know the number for poison control.
Are you sighing at your phone and judging me right now?
I NEVER left your party last night of anyone asks.
Yeah, I didn't wake up handcuffed to my bed either.
porn backed up onto portable hard disk, laptop charged, battery backup in place, two cases beer, handle of vodka, poptarts and beef jerky --- bring it sandy.
I got to see some gay bartender let a girl with daddy issues whip Travis in the balls with his own belt. Totally worth it.
I'm Michael Phelps, Olympic Champion.
Are you just smoking weed? Cause that's not actually a Michael Phelps costume
I don't have any plans for New Year's except watching anime and drinking until I can't read the subtitles anymore.
He took a girl home at like eight, fucked her, kicked her out, came back to the bar, and repeated the process again at 10:30 and 2:30. THREE GIRLS IN ONE NIGHT. ALL PICKUPS. I HATE HIM.
she was sitting on the toilet asking for me to take a "cute facebook profile picture" for her
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
Randomize
