Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
I'm taking this break up pretty rough.. I've never been to sad to masturbate.
She's in the middle of blacking out but is singing Mariah carey songs. Hitting every note.
She just told me she's too full for a reach-around. Sad.
He had me believing he was actually British until he came and used his real voice.
uhh when the x-ray tec was moving your head you licked his hand and meowed.. i think he knew you weren't sober
is it weird that I didn't think he was hot last night when I was making out with him but right now I'm Facebook stalking him and think he's really attractive??
your beer goggles are on backwards.
seeing two freshman taking a cab home at noon on a Monday makes me realize how much worse my life choices could have been
I may have farted on a group of children. It may not have been an accident.
Is it wrong that the only reason I'd want Savannah in my wedding party is to watch her whore around and drink?
I'm going to miss recovering from hangovers on the beach. Rolling around in my dorm bed and watching Friends reruns is just gonna feel like slumming it.
You have a husband. I have a bag full of electronics. This, is the single life.
I seriously feel like I just crawled out from under a shit covered rock. I'm NEVER drinking like that again...well, not for alteast a solid 3 hours.
I didn’t eat all day. Got really drunk at a bruins game and puked in a random dunkies cup on the T
If that doesn’t scream I’m from New England, I don’t know what does
Randomize
