I decided to name my penis gatorade...is it in you?
Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
Just lost my virginity while listening to rick astley. torn between horror and jubilation
i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
IDK who she called, but some guy came into the party, flying drop kicked Joe said never again. She has to invite him around again.
Unfortunately hes not a hipster douchebag with no life goals, so naturally I'm not interested.
I may or may not be wearing slippers and a TMNT hat. This thing better not have a dress code.
Fuck away man. Like 3% of these new people will be back next week. This is the best week of the year to slam bitches at the gym.
Dude. My knees have no hair on them and they're bruised. My thigh is killing me. I have about 1000 texts to about 5 exes which I horribly regret. I have pictures of my own penis on my phone. I can't find my iPad. And I have work in an hour.
Something bad happened. I'm just giving you some notice. So you can smoke some pot and hide all sharp items in the house.
You were petting a 40 year old man's moustache for 15 minutes
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
I look excited, but its just a facade.
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