Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
So i banged this chick from Peru last night. Needless to say, I'm having chipotle for lunch todayas a south American reward to honor her.
do you know how scary it is to wake up in a CATSCAN machine after a night of drinking?
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
I'm crossing my legs while pooping. Taking a shit has never looked so proper.
Legitimate logistical question....how did you pee in your duct tape dress?
Why is your name written on my hand surrounded by hearts and a bartenders phone number?
Was just walking through the park by the river. Saw some random in a tree, we climbed up, blazed with him and bought a bag. In the tree. Real shit.
Dude, did you really "knight me" and tell me I had permission to bang your sister last night?
Thanks for letting me rent out your vagina rec room. I don't expect the security deposit back.
I don't think you should be sorry for such memorable sex that I yell your name when you aren't around.
There is a special place in hell for people who only eat the center of the pot brownies.
I rocked his world in the back of my car in an overly-lit, heavily trafficked parking lot. Middle age is amazing!
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
Randomize
