I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
Is it weird that I miss finding cum in my bed?
Shaving your vagina at 8 months pregnant is not an easy chore.
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
I'm doing lines by myself in the kitchen. I think your outside. yeah that's you. your naked.
No The bastards made me buy a new one, They don't cover water damage an apparently they consider salsa water damage
In less than 24 hrs I went from conversing with Nobel Laureate, to hangover vomiting in front of a drive thru cashier
HELP A SISTER OUT. AND KEEP YOUR TONGUE OUT OF THE HUMMUS.
TOO HIGH TO FIGURE THIS SHIT OUT
I have fireworks and redbull; let's make heart attack inducing magic happen.
Telling the family you're going for a run, getting dressed in workout clothes, and then walking halfway around the block and smoking a joint. This is my life
Your fuck buddy is making you watch the OC. I think that counts as strings attached.
I was so high the sounds of a cricket drove me out of my home at 4am.... Boo that fucking cricket
It gave me the St Patrick's Day nickname Slutty McShitfaced. I've never felt so understood.
So, anyways, aside from wanting to seduce my roommate for booze, how's everything been
Please tell me I did not drink enough whiskey to think that having sex with my boyfriend while his best friend was on the floor next to us was a good idea.
Randomize