She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
guess who came home with a hottie last night
Def drugged
If you win this game of words with friends, ill suck you off for 30 minutes. No lie.
I cant last that long. Do i get the rollover minutes?
I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
Was the mom I hooked up with decently attractive I feel like her two friends were hotter
there is laundry and salad ALL OVER my car, i need context
Is "incoherent" a legit goal to strive for tonight? Or should I stay sober enough to fuck who I can?
Missing part of a tooth cos I tried to open a beer with my teeth, just saw a dude that looked like bill Cosby though so things are looking up
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
Okay I shall begin. Thank you Swedish chef
Hurrfy smmurdshy burrfst!
That is the exact response I was looking for.
She flashed them and they let her pay with Monopoly money. I'm married, so it is your obligation as my best man to repeatedly fuck her for me
To describe how high he was he said, " I'm cocked out of my ape sandwich" so yes...that was some pretty good weed.
Do you knowhow much it sucks to puke in an automatic toilet? Not fun.
Ew.
It takes talent let's just say that
Dear Andy-the problem is not that I slept with your girlfriend, it's that you didn't know she's a lesbian.
It's only 3 AM. There's still time to get arrested today.
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