3.50 mugs at the bar.
Nah man, im with an ugly chick. Im waiting til everyone's drunk enough tonight, they don't notice.
How ugly, and does she have friends?
I'm not really sure how I got home, but judging by this headache, i'm assuming it involved bourbon.
i think i had to give the cab driver my id to get home last night because i couldnt talk.
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
I woke up on the toilet with my feet gorilla glued to the floor, cake and makeup on my face and my hand glued to my head.
Welcome to the world of vodka. Rule #1: NEVER PASS OUT. Happy 21st
I'm pretty sure my lung is caught on my rib. And I can't feel the left side of my face. Best. Sex. Ever.
You will never know an awkward moment until your parents pick you up from a one night stand.
I'm just chillin on the bathroom floor
Haha oh no
The bathroom floor is like my second bedroom on the weekends
Sex with him is like pizza, it can be shitty but its stillll pizza.....
I accidentally flashed three cops last night. Stone cold sober.
I'm watching Part of Your World now and I'm crying and I feel like I'm floating right along with her. This. This right here is some drunken Disney Magic
This is not a drill. I need a cape. And a tuxedo. Simultaneously. Repeat. NOT. A. DRILL....
And I mean really who loses their phone in a tree
You were laying on the floor coloring a "get well soon' card for your liver...
remind me again why we thought drinking hungarian moonshine was a good idea
Randomize
