I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
she said "can't you just pull out and cum on my face? I hate scooping jizz out of my vag".
I'm assuming you texted me by mistake. you're not jizzing in or on me again, thanks for playing, douchebag.
you were saying "i am the vodka queen!" and then in a different voice replying to yourself "all hail the vodka queen! you are so beautiful!"
Is it a step in the wrong direction to ask my parents for a kegerator for graduation?
I don't want to get into details but it feels like there was a bear mauling involved. A very good bear mauling.
I can't live in this building much longer. People are starting to figure out that it's me making the weird sex noises.
I thought my period ended but I felt it again as soon as Pitbull started playing
Is eating fries while lying on the floor bad for you?
If I choke and die at least I will have been doing something I love
Can I please come dance in my bra to destiny's child with you? I'll bring the wine and the glitter
I should rephrase... I'm trying to not sit on other peoples faces besides my boyfriends.
When she tells her friend, "hey I'll be back tomorrow, just going to fuck a guy", right in front of you, you know you've got a winner.
Well, I crapped my pants in front of her entire family, was laughed out of their house, and I had to walk home with shit stained pants. So, yeah, it went really well.
WHY DOES MY BOYFRIEND'S BROTHER HAVE TO BE SO FUCKING HOT
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
She pooped on me during a reverse cowgirl. And it wasn't a little bit either.
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