I really like you and I'm tired of just hooking up. I want you be my boyfriend.
Uhh, I'm not breaking up with my girlfriend to be with you.
and she's shaped like a lego person so that's not happening
Promise me that if I become one of those sad people that facebook pesters you to 'reconnect with' you'll tell me so I can delete mine and save myself the humiliation?
an ex called crying about her current BF. convo ended in phone sex. i love emotional wrecks
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
i was playing the convince him im sober game through texting. i spelled most of the words right. i hope.
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
my drunken justification for peeing in her closet was that her shoes were ugly
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
facebook is just a cold reminder of all the times other bitches won my hookups
I hope you get stoned and think that you're a seal in shark infested waters
Nothing better then waking up to multiple snap stories of people doing body shots of tequlia off of you
Actually, lets be honest. I will probably keep calling him the pastor because it brings me joy using pastor and fuck buddy in the same sentence.
Are those your contacts stuck to the mirror?!
Yeah. Drunk me tried to put my contacts on the mirror where my eyes were.
I would climb him like a jungle gym. Enthusiastically and creatively.
Randomize
