i woke up under my mattress pad with him laying naked next to me and his wwjd bracelet on my nightstand.
nice, that's exactly what jesus would do.
Did u pay ur friends to not make fun of me?
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
I don't care if the man pisses on teenage girls, he's enchanting.
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
It's sad the highlight of the night was you didn't electrocute yourself again.
The only thing that was weird was that it WASN'T weird when she got out of the shower and saw me blowing him.
You're welcome to join, but just to warn you, tequila makes my clothes disappear. And I'm telling you that as an adult to an adult, not as your supervising teacher who decides whether or not you graduate.
Pizza toast. It's like pizza but on toast. BC we are broke. OMG its so good.
You would never do this sober.
Teeth make me feel like a dinosaur. Can you feel yours?
She needs sedatives and a leash
We learned many a lesson today about drug use in canoes
I'm tired of looking like my mother fucked Chewbacca.
You make any dick jokes involving sushi and there WILL be consequences.
Sushi is fucking sacred in this house and I will kill you if you try and taint that.
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
Randomize
