respond to me or i'm telling everyone that you inserted a vodka soaked tampon into your anus
I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
I learned an important lesson last night: Jameson giveth, but Jameson also taketh away.
Cruelly.
Bullshit. No way. If I brushed past your penis it was completely coincidental.
I cannot even. Taco bell reception. Beers. New friends from Georgia.
Experimentation with dessert toppings followed by shower sex. Only logical progression bro.
He pulled out, and the resulting cumstain on my sheets is in the shape of a fetus. The irony of this is both awesome and terrifying.
just found a someones bra in what seems to be a mix of pickle juice and vodka in my fridge. Who was over here lately?
Lusting after Beyonce when you're a lesbian is like having a crush on Jesus. You just don't do it.
HIS NAME IN MY PHONE IS JOSHUA DREAMCHASER I CAN NOT
NO SHAME NOVEMBER
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
Someone explain to me why I woke up to find a stolen shopping cart in my room...
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