Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
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This is sufficient.
Dude, she's just using you for your money, and Cavs tickets.
Honestly, what else do I have going for me?
You make a valid point.
everyone knows he gets back in a week and after that i'm not sleeping around anymore. it's like i have a expiration date.
I was thinking of baby names while I was giving him a blow job
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
guess who's bored in chemistry researching how to sneak weed through airport security in her vagina?
You're mold. I may or maynot have puked blood this morning.
I'm approaching homosexuality at an increasingly alarming rate with each break up.
What should I say back?
Well, how do you want the conversation to go?
Straight into my pants.
He didn't get laid that weekend.. and that is honestly an accomplishment for the rest of us.
I just wanna get hammered somewhere crazy. Meet some chicks. Bang them and then go scuba diving.
You're too drunk for my bullshit, and i'm too sober to put up with yours. I have no idea how you expect to find middle ground here.
I just threw up into a baby carriage. There was a baby in it.
How’d it go?
I accidentally joined a cult
So not great...
Randomize
