Who did Billy Mays play for?
i just spent the last half hour thinking about my totally irrational and intense hatred of wedge flip flops.
i think i just witnessed the elusive male walk of shame
he came on my stomach and it was 1000 degrees in his car. i smelled awesome.
the homeless guy was waiting for me this morning. this is the closest to a boyfriend ive had in years.
We almost forgot to tip the maids, so we left the rest of the gin, some tonic water and a lime. They earned it
When you turn your data bak on you're gonna get a pic of a nipple but it's not mine
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
I bruised my dick hopping over that fence last night
Sean slept in the bushes beside my house again. Any reason he kept screaming/slurring 'it was all a bunch of goddamn lies' through out the night?
Dude...I slept walked to the free condom bin in the lounge last night. I don't know why.
i just hope we're both dead or in prison at the same time
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
long story short, the bouquet was used as a sacrificial torch
While buying Plan B the lady at the counter looked at me and said hope you have a successful night as I walked away in shame
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