We hit a deer, sort of a buzz kill. But it's fine.
I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
I just used a franzia box to scrape the snow off my car.
you threw up in the bushes next to the ABC store and kept saying "you're home, blueberry vodka, you're home!"
yeah, he just sent me a picture of himself with his shirt off.... It didnt turn me on, it just made me want to buy him a big mac....
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
how do i tell him I'm always in the mood without sounding like a slut?
She liked every single Facebook status in her newsfeed and then made her status 'I LIKE U GUYS'
Ignoring the crisis im in. Sitting in the front yard in a kiddie pool. Wearing arm floaties, fins and a snorkel. Waiting for a hot guy to walk by.
My absolute favorite part of last night was after I puked in the ally, we rounded the corner and you screamed, "she's ok!" and everyone cheered
OMG CHARGE YOUR PHONE I NEED TO KNOW IF THIS IS A GOOD PICTURE OF MY ASS
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
I watched a compilation video today of a guy banging his sex doll to edm music. I just had to tell someone.
he was wearing pj pants, thank you for not letting me go home with him
Once you start using "cuddles" as a code word for sex you'll never get real cuddles again
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