on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
Nothing screams don't date me louder then having your baby as your profile pic
He just kept yelling woof and then threw money all over me...
I just want you to know IcyHot in the ear is weird. Don't ask.
That's why she's the girl with her life together and you're the girl with the penis drawn on your car.
I was so stoned on the way to work, I pretended you were in the car with me. We sang "Mrs. Jackson" by outkast.
please don't fuck her on my bed i'm too poor for laundry quarters
I think I'm in love. He's everything I ever wanted for myself, just with a lot more drugs.
Getting drunk and falling down, isnt the best way to describe your hobbies, to your new co-workers.
for real. if he messaged me that i'd have made his penis cower in a corner.
Finally hooked up with her. She bought me tacos after because "she can do better in a bed". You're gonna be my best man.
I might as well walk around wearing a sandwich board and accept the fact that I'm dying single.
She wore her engagement ring the whole time we fucked. I hate her fiancee, so it was cool
That seems dangerous to buy acid from a stranger on craigslist
He has fairy lights round his bed.. And played Jamie cullum when we had sex... Hes batting for the other team right?
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