its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
you were just eating all his cookies and kept mumbling "them crumblies" when the crumbs got on your shirt.
Ok so now that we've actually had sex do I get the last name or are u really witness protection status?
Our house almost burnt down last night. I woke up at 4:10am to the smoke alarm going off bc the bean bag chair was on fire so i extinguished it and smoked a bowl at 4:20 to celebrate my fire extinguishing abilities
So are you still down for me to come stay with you and just have sex on vicodin all weekend?
Your message has been received by an unknown user. Picture verification required.
Fried chicken is a must. Do strippers eat fried chicken or should I plan on something else?
I have a bruise on dick where you tried to "high five" me.
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
I've already dropped her on the ground of a crowded bar dancing , been incoherent drunk to the point i couldn't speak and came within 2 seconds all on separate evenings so at this point she should know what I'm about
if Anne Taylor knew what she did in her clothes, she'd be banned from the store.
oh come on, it's the perfect length summer dress to blow a stranger in the bathroom in
My Captain America poster fell down. Cap is disappointed in my life decisions.
At least his std test came back clean, gotta look at the positives here
I might go bald with this hair pulling thing every night.
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
Randomize
