My dick has been asking about u. He said he didn't do anything wrong n I'm a dumbass
As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
the crazy preacher outside Willard just began a monologue that began with "when i look at a vagina." We should stop by there more often
i feel as uncomfortable as your camel toe looks.
I found her face down on the kitchen floor asking anybody who walked by for Kraft Dinner
who knew tequila and Christmas cookies would go so well together
I just set an alarm for 5 am tomorrow morning titled "Wake and Bake Its Christmas motherfucker"
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
New low: uploading my contacts into Facebook in an attempt to get the name of the girl I brought home last night.
and then after the older sorority girl asked me his name she said "he gave me the rest of his mcdonalds and I decided to go home with him. it was the best that I could hope for my night"
you found yr lighter in yr cleavage and said so that's where you've been all my life
She sent me a thank you card for not fucking her boyfriend...
I really prefer to do my walks of shame in the summer
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