my boyfriend just said he'd go down on me if I gave him my password to facebook
Court Ordered Rehab!!! Do you think I'll need a swimsuit?
i cant be the least bit upset about his new gf cause all i think is that she has to put things in his ass
Puked in a plastic neiman Marcus bag while driving. My biggest accomplishment yet
True life I used my fake as a photo id for my final. My professor told me good luck and laughed. Hope the bouncers are in the St. Patrick's day spirit.
its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out
He gets a blow job; I get my oil changed free of charge. And that way I only see him every 2500 miles.
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
Don't let her tell you any different. She licked the balls of my hamster for that $100. It was a group bet. She won.
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
I'm not even mad. I was just trying to get a boner, you're the one that had to see that
You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone.
His idea of a night out is drinking beer in the driveway. He's been on house arrest too long
I'm not gonna lie. I need sex like plants need water right now. I just need the dick.
It's to the point where if a guy can so much as find my clit, I'll consider him amazing in bed
Randomize
