What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
When the phrase "Wow your huge" came out of her mouth I knew it was gonna be a good night.
saw a man at the beach in a red speedo. when he rolled over he unintentionally displayed a HUGE skid mark.
so apparently we got drunk enough at the reception to rip the center pieces apart and use the flower vases as "fancy glasses"
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
Living in the dorms has served one purpose and one purpose only for me: to teach me that pooping in public bathrooms is okay and that I can do it
i was so high i thought the horse on my poster was running
If we don't have crazy animal sex tonight at least twice, I'll know he's cheating on me.
Who wouldn't want crazy animal sex with you?!
A cheater.
I was going to be upset with you on moral grounds but then i realized free chocolate was involved
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos?
I miss my bedroom and my bed and being able to spray myself with my choice of 15 different perfumes so I don't have to wake up to the smell of my past sins
She's currently singing "I'm gonna keep on lovin you" to her pillow. How do you think tonight went?
I have to lie to someone and move five gallons of fermenting alcohol across campus but after that i'll hit you up 4 sho
I had a good weekend too...although I cried about the dog in a drunken stupor last night...not one of my finest moments, but it's all water under the bridge.
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